I guess I'll actually do this, now...since I said I would...

Lets see....ok, so I had a friend we called
Guppy, Guppy was a good kid, he didn't like
fighting or arguing much, he wasn't a hot
head like the rest of us. When he passed away
it hit all of us really hard.

Anyways thats not he point. Ok, so a couple of days after his death, me and my homeboys, Mousy,Toaster,Little Mike, Pokemon and Chewie(Guppy's brother) were hanging out in Guppy's garage.....actually Guppy was there too....he just happened to be in an urn sitting on a coffe table. He always wanted to be cremated(something about no dealing with the bull sh*** off funerals.) As where sitting there, I forgot who, but someone mentions,"you know Guppy wanted to have his ashes dumped in the ocean'' I remeber him saying that, at the time we gave him a hard time calling him a sensetive sissy and what not.(we were just giving him a hard time) Chewie said something about letting his moms know and we'd do it tonight.

So with Chewie's and Guppy's moms blessing, we all jumped in Chewie's compact at 12:30 in the morning(it's technically illegal to dump anything into the ocean without written permission...and we sure as hell didn't have that) being the biggest of the five I rode shotgun with Chewie and we stuffed Moe,Larry and Curly in the back and threw in the lesser known Stooge, Shemp in there also, for good measure. Four dudes in a space meant for two.

So were driving down to Redondo, and things are understandably kinda tense.All of a sudden Mousy starts tripp'n and tells Pokemon to move his legs over, I'm never gonna forget the respond, ''Foo' ,why don't you tell Mikey to move his f***** legs?!" (in case I forgot to mention Little Mike is paralyzed from the waist down) of course Mikey didn't take that too good and he joins in the agument.Meanwhile Toasters is laughing his a** off(he has Guppy in his hands) then I join in cause it's ticking me off that there fighting at a time like this. Then Chewie jumps in complaining he can't pay attention to the road.

I don't know if you know about the conditions of some of the roads in Los Angeles, but sure enough Chewie hits a pot hole, I don't know what happened but next thing I know theres Guppy dust all over the back seat and its all over the four idiots in the back( I don't know if you ever seen human ashes before, but you can still see little bits of bone in them!) it gets really quiet, and then we all start laughing hysterically...well everyone except Toaster whose has his head out the window vomiting( I think he got some inside his mouth)

When we finally get near the beach we pull over and the the four stooges in the back walk up to the beach railing and decide to strip to their boxers and shake the Guppy out of their clothes( I guess they helped Mikey undress) and into the water meanwhile Chewi is using one of those hand vacs to pick up what remains of his brother(along with Dorito crumbs and pennys) while I stand there with the urn so he can put his brother in with the rest of him. After that we join the rest of the guys who were changing back into their clothes had a little eulogy where each of us talked about him real quick, Guppy was a blah, blah, blah... we hope that in death you finally find th peace you could not when you were alive... blah, blah, blah the usual stuff.

To try to make this long story a little shorter, we drove back to the neighborhood, we all went home and never spoke about it again.

Well thats it...in retrospect its not as funny as I first thought it was gonna be...sorry